Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Sales Pitch Anxiety
I hate it when people try to sell me stuff. I'm not talking about your traditional used-car salesmen, or even telemarketing. I'm not even talking about that bane of human existence: spam. Don't get me wrong - telemarketing and spam anger me so much that smoke starts to emanate from my ears, but I think almost everyone hates those things, and generates their own reasonable amount of ear-smoke.
Rather, I'm talking about the people that try to sell you stuff on the sly. For instance, when you're eating at a restaurant, and the waiter asks, "Can I start you off with a drink or an appetizer? Maybe our baby crispy honey bar-b-q double-pan-fried wasabi monkey poppers?" I'm sure it works on some people. But for me, it just pisses me off. I'm in your damn restaurant already. I'm giving you my money. Most likely, unless you kick me in the groin, I'll tip you at least 15%. Stop peddling your wares. I know, it'll drive the check up 5-10 bucks, thus driving up the tip 1-2 dollars. Do that a lot over your shift and you'll increase your total earnings like 50 bucks per night. Is it really worth your dignity, you appetizer-peddling whore?!
One problem, though, is that I think I've become oversensitive to sales pitches. I don't even like it when I'm in a store and people ask me if I need help. I always think they're going to try to sell me something. If I need help, I'll ask. Trust me. What weird is that I'm a relatively social guy, but sometimes, I'll avoid going into a store if I'm going to be the only customer in there, just because I know that I'll attract the salespeople's attention, and they'll start to swarm. This seems a tad unhealthy to me.
I went to vote today, and was cringing as I walked up to the polls. I really didn't want to be accosted. I don't know why - by now, it should be apparent that I have no problem engaging people in debates about unimportant crap, but I definitely had some level of anxiety. Maybe I have some self-esteem issues. Nah. Probably was just something I ate. I don't know if the poll groupies sensed my anxiety, or I just looked like I already had my mind made up, but they left me alone. Personally, I'm hoping that in November, some Bush supporter tries to convert me, because I think I might just scream obscenities at them until they give up. I do live in Maryland, though - Bush supporters are hard to come by here. One can dream, though.
Rather, I'm talking about the people that try to sell you stuff on the sly. For instance, when you're eating at a restaurant, and the waiter asks, "Can I start you off with a drink or an appetizer? Maybe our baby crispy honey bar-b-q double-pan-fried wasabi monkey poppers?" I'm sure it works on some people. But for me, it just pisses me off. I'm in your damn restaurant already. I'm giving you my money. Most likely, unless you kick me in the groin, I'll tip you at least 15%. Stop peddling your wares. I know, it'll drive the check up 5-10 bucks, thus driving up the tip 1-2 dollars. Do that a lot over your shift and you'll increase your total earnings like 50 bucks per night. Is it really worth your dignity, you appetizer-peddling whore?!
One problem, though, is that I think I've become oversensitive to sales pitches. I don't even like it when I'm in a store and people ask me if I need help. I always think they're going to try to sell me something. If I need help, I'll ask. Trust me. What weird is that I'm a relatively social guy, but sometimes, I'll avoid going into a store if I'm going to be the only customer in there, just because I know that I'll attract the salespeople's attention, and they'll start to swarm. This seems a tad unhealthy to me.
I went to vote today, and was cringing as I walked up to the polls. I really didn't want to be accosted. I don't know why - by now, it should be apparent that I have no problem engaging people in debates about unimportant crap, but I definitely had some level of anxiety. Maybe I have some self-esteem issues. Nah. Probably was just something I ate. I don't know if the poll groupies sensed my anxiety, or I just looked like I already had my mind made up, but they left me alone. Personally, I'm hoping that in November, some Bush supporter tries to convert me, because I think I might just scream obscenities at them until they give up. I do live in Maryland, though - Bush supporters are hard to come by here. One can dream, though.
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